How 'bout a Fresca?

If I were to tell you that President Lyndon Johnson had a button installed on his desk in the Oval Office which would summon his military aid to bring him another Fresca, would that be something you might be interested in? I thought so. In honor of the 36th Presdient of the United States- wherever you are, go down to your local convenience store, crack open an ice-cold Fresca, and be refreshed. I'm sure he would not veto that decision.

Did you also know that Fresca is the only Coke product that does not have a Pepsi equivalent? Talk about cornering the market on grapefruit-flavored refreshment. Well done Sirs.

Dallas Week in D.C.

If the game were not played, but instead the competition was judged on the lyrical skills of their respective fans, I think it's clear that Dem Skins would come out on top... Judge for yourself.

VERSUS

Rick Sutcliffe on the Wall Street Bailout

Hi. This is famous pitcher and ESPN analyst Rick Sutcliffe. I want to talk to you about the $700 billion Wall Street bailout that is being finalized today. I'm not so sure that this thing won't be a success. I mean, look at Sen. Chris Dodd over there, he knows what he's doing. Barney Frank- smartest man in Washington. Treasury Secretary Paulson ran Goldman Sachs- he knows the marketplace, how to make a profit, how to fix it. Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke was an Economics Professor at Princeton- you telling me he doesn't know about supply and demand?

Look, I know folks are worried. George Clooney, he's over there trying to fix Africa, that whole thing. We got some smart people working on our own problems. If we need Clooney, or Bono, we'll get 'em to help. My friend Bill Murray once made a movie called "Groundhog Day", where every day was the same and he got better and better at stuff so that he could get to tomorrow. That's what's going on here- our elected officials are getting closer and closer to a deal, so that tomorrow will be better than today.

Let's see if they can't fix Wall Street, so that Main Street won't fail.

UPDATE (9/26/08):

Uh oh, I'm not so sure this thing won't fail now. That old coot John McCain flew into DC as a bipartisan, bicameral deal was agreed to, and now he's gone and blown it all up. This looks like a political ploy to appear as if he saved the deal, and now it seems he busted it. Reminds me of what my daddy always told me- "Sut, you break it, you buy it." He better get on board, or else the train's going to leave the station without him.

my dad once taught my mom a lesson in this very same way...

Cereal

Every morning I wake up pissed off ready to break a bitch's skull open. This morning was no different. I woke up, took a shower, pissed excellence, and made the jaunt down stairs to enjoy an organic cup of raisin bran (no homo). Much to my dismay, I apparently do not live with a polite, young, Ukrainian doctor, but instead with a sneaky russian bastard who decided the house shall follow the rules of the iron curtain. Bitch, I'm a free market capitalist... you reap what you sow. Needless to say my raisin bran was gone, watch out doctor.

very likely

There will be a large number of relatively casual skiers in attendance, no doubt. Should the subject of a trip to, say, Tahoe be raised, a core-off will most assuredly follow.

Bald Asshole

Will he or won't he get into a core-off this Saturday?